This was probably the most impulsive meal I've made in a long time.
My work schedule doesn't leave a whole lot of time for cooking anything weird these days, but today was an exception, I finished while the supermarkets were still open!
During my usual end of day 'I have another 30 minutes before I can catch a train home' internet-browsing malaise, I stumbled upon an article about one of the few chefs whos career I actually follow, one Matthew Matheson, or as Cancer Bats fans may know him, Matty BSOD.
I'm just gonna save myself some typing and link to the article in question, which fills ya in on his impressive background, and gives a sneak preview of what I'd be making this evening.
So after reading that, and being intrigued enough to want to try it out myself, I thought fuck it, why not? Picked up the ingredients within an hour of first hearing of this dish, and got to work!
I was unable to track down the specific cheese mentioned in that article, but luckily they did suggest camembert or brie as a suitable substitute. I went for camembert, as for some reason I had it in my head that it would work better when melty, and brie was more of a cold cheese.
Fuck knows, I know next to nothing about food.
I did however manage to get the Medjool dates after much trawling of aisles, I almost punched the air (and a shop assistant) when I finally found them. I also splashed out a bit of cash on some pretty top notch bacon, because all the other streaky stuff looked like the shavings left on a slughterhouse floor.
So with it all assembled in a photogenic fashion, I got cutting! As you can pretty goddamn clearly see, you need to de-seed the dates yourself, yet leave them intact enough to be able to close like a casket around a particularly cheesey corpse.
Since I was making enough to feed two (HA! as if anyone else would ever eat my cooking), I de-seeded every date, and used half of my wheel of camembert to fill 'em.
Yes, actually, it WAS necessary to arrange them like that. It makes food taste better when you're a pretentious prick during the preparation, true fact. You can probably guess what comes next, but incase you're too fucking stupid, here's a pic anyways...
Yep, big shock, you stuff the dates with the camembert! Holy shit, I did not see that one coming.
Start a fire under a pan, and tear into your over-expensive pack of bacon. Give it a quick sizzle on each side, before removing it from the pan and rolling each streak around a cheesey date, pinning the whole messy thing together with a toothpick. When you have enough of 'em made, pop them in the oven at around gas mark 4 for a coupla minutes to melt the cheese and caramelise the sugar in the dates.
Remove, and serve with something slightly healthier than thick cheese entombed in pure sugar and shrouded in flayed pigflesh. In the spirit of hallowe'en, I went for a Spooky Satanic Salad.
Put it all together, and get ready to taste something that feels like a heart attack as you type up some bullshit about it an hour later.
Here's some weirdo music I've never heard that fits the post title. I can't be fucked finding references to horseback in music I love, and devils is too obvious. Enjoy, or don't, I give no fucks either way.
No comments:
Post a Comment