Weekend Nachos

As anyone with half a brain already knows, nachos are the ultimate in snackage. They're like Manowar, any other snacks are just false and weak in comparison.

So with this in mind, I decided to have a go at preparing the ultimate topping for my tortilla chips from scratch: homemade salsa with mexicana cheese and hotsauce.

Ingredients (to serve 2 hungry heshers):

• 2 decent sized red tomatoes
• 1 red onion (half of it should be enough)
• 1 clove of garlic (or more if you don't give a fuck about your breath)
• 1 red chilli (or yellow. either way, leave the seeds in unless you're some sort of pussy)
• 1 bag of cheap shitty tortilla chips (fuck Doritos)
• about half a block of 'Mexicana' cheese (or standard cheddar if your market/deli isn't as awesome as mine)
• Your own choice of hot sauce. Tonight I went for Nandos Peri Peri Hot, but there are a trillion excellent options.
• Small tubs of sour cream and guacamole for dippage.

Once you have all your ingredients assembled in the above fashion, complete with big fuckin' knife, it's time to SHRED your ingredients, into the appropriate sizes.
Slice and dice your tomatoes into pretty small chunks, then chuck 'em in a seperate dish for now. Now slice your onions into rings, or just cut them up whatever way you feel like if you screw up the rings like I did. Throw the chopped onions into the dish with your tomatoes, and get started on the chilli. I used a pretty small/thin chilli tonight, but you can make up for this by having some cojones and leaving most of the seeds attached. Slice the chilli up, and add it to the tomatoes and onions.

Set that dish aside for a minute, and unwrap that chunk of yellow heaven known as cheese. cut about half of it off the block, and grate it up. Once that's done, get your grill on. Some people put it in the oven, but fuck that, I'm a grill man.
Arrange your tortilla chips on a plate or platter in an artistic fashion, grab handfuls of salsa and load it on top of the chips til you have a decent level of coverage, then handfuls of grated cheese on top of your salsa. Grab your weapon of choice from the hotsauce rack, and splash it absolutely everywhere, the spicier the better (words to live life by). Crack some peppercorns and grated chilli flakes over the mess you've created, and slide it under your grill.
Most of the time I like my food as raw as possible, but since there's no meat in nachos, leave it under the flames until you can HEAR it cooking, and the cheese is bubbling like a volcano.
Remove, gaze on the beast you've created, then serve with a brew from down Mexico way. My own personal preference would be Modelo but it's hard to track down, so if you gotta settle for Corona, then so be it.

Enjoy.